To Dream or NOT to Dream

As a Kid I dreamt and dreamt big! Everything I came across inspired a dream. The beggars on the streets told me I will build an orphanage, fancy apartments said I will be a property developer, behind the scenes edits of a Walt Disney cartoon told me I will be a CEO of Marketing and sales company that made the final decision on catch phrases. I couldn’t wait to grow up and put all my dreams in motion. Then I grew up…

Something about growing up made me afraid to even dream.  When a dream came to mind I quickly shut it out because I had learnt once I dreamt it, it wouldn’t happen for me – It was the failed ideas, the cost required vs my mundane salary, the embarrassment that I had discussed yet another dreams with family and friends only to admit yet another failure sometimes even before the project could start.  Suddenly a world I thought was my oyster suddenly looked too big for a little girl.  I was skeptical of even other people’s stories, “ take it with a pinch of salt after all you never know the full story just what you were told” I would say, “ Do you know if she has a godfather and is editing her journey?”. And to me this wasn’t being a pessimist it was simply being realistic because somehow with my experiences and with growing up I was sure I was more the wiser. So like everyone else I stuck to a 9-5- it pays the bill, keeps me afloat and as it is people envy where I am with life so why complain or dare hunger for more?

But something in me remained unsettled. Because I had dreamt and dreamt big! So I couldn’t understand this. There must be more to life. This can’t be all there is to living. This isn’t even living it is mare existing. So now I am learning the only thing I should fear is fear it self. I can’t let fear cripple me while life keeps passing by. Though I haven’t put any of my dreams to motion, I am learning to dream again and control my fears. When I am afraid to dream I will remind myself the past is the past. If the failings of the past aren’t lessons learnt for growth then it is simply the past. And when the size of my dreams overwhelms me I shall say to my self “if you can dream it you can do it”.


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